Family Relations Class - Joslyn Mortensen

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Week 2/11/13

This week in family relations class, we talked about some of the important things to know in dating. This is the process that is so often looked past in today's world that needs to be addressed. People today just don't date. I learned a couple of things that I didn't necessarily agree with before. For instance, the question was brought up about the first date. If I don't see things going anywhere with a young man should I decline the date? I was surprised to find that most people disagreed with me that it is alright to say no. Instead, it is fine to realize that I need to practice getting to know a variety of people as well as learn how to interact with different people. There shouldn't be so much weight put into the first date. First dates are meant to be fun and relaxed - just a good time. If you cannot necessarily "see yourself marrying that person" don't say no - you never know if you're misjudging them and it's an opportunity to get out and date a variety of people. I'm trying to adopt this kind of attitude, which is not far from my own, but at the same time if I said yes to every guy who asked me on a date I might be having more long Friday (date night) nights than I would like, so good judgement is needed in that process as well. Also, once a couple begins courting, that doesn't mean that dating should stop. Courting means that people are just seeing one another exclusively and if that is the case, they still need to date and continue to get to know one another. Also, we do not get to know people just in three months, in fact, that is when we barely start to see the real people who have begun to let their "pretty face" come off. It is so crucial to date someone and get to know them a bit more thoroughly before we decide to become engaged to them.

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Week February 4th Blog

After this week I decided that my family is quite unique and the women have taken the role of men – but we can still refine ourselves and be ladies. I grew up the youngest in a family of seven children where six of us are girls and only one is a boy. The only reason why I think we have a few more manly attributes is because every single one of us has been raised on my Dad’s farm/ranch. My dad has started each of us out young working hard to help him on the farm/ranch and consequently working like men. My brother never had issues with being feminine, we girls all have had a little bit of a Tom Boy streak in us. I personally wouldn’t have any problem going out and making the income for my future family because I enjoy labor (that’s just the way I’ve been raised). However, my parents also taught the importance motherhood and how it is our divine calling to be mothers and wives. It was just interesting in our discussion to realize that I myself am a very odd girl as far as gender roles go. My roommates and friends have even told me this, but I actually quite often enjoy being alone (a man-like quality), I am extremely competitive (another man-like quality), I can be very aggressive (another), and over all I am a bit of a mix. Even though I enjoy these things, I am sensitive and very aware of social situations, I love to notice people’s feelings and be aware of emotions, and by taking notice and thinking of myself I know that I am in fact proving the “woman” thing to do. And when we were talking about how women coddle to the children after they fall down, I am planning on raising my kids to be tough. I want my girls to think that when they fall down they’re fine. I appreciate the way I’ve been raised because I can still be a lady (which all the women in my family do so beautifully – like an art), but I am also independent and strong like a man. I hope to somehow pass these things on to my children as well.

Monday, February 4, 2013

Week 1/28/13

I do think that all cultures are equal in terms of being right and wrong as far as their own beliefs go. I agree with some of the earlier comments that I read through – that culture is similar to our religion. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints does not say that any other churches are necessarily wrong or that they are sinning. Instead we know that they are worshipping in a way that they believe to be right and it is just that they do not have the whole truth. Perhaps some cultures just do not have all the resources or necessary information to know that the things that they are doing aren’t especially correct. The American culture can learn several things from other cultures as well. For instance, we can learn from Latin cultures the greater importance of families or the friendliness of Brazilians or the honesty of the Japanese culture. These are all things to consider and to be aware of when judging other people. Cultures are different and thus, it is not a wise thing to say if someone is doing good or bad because we don’t know their situation, beliefs, or values.

Monday, January 28, 2013

Week 1/21/12

This week I was impressed at the family mapping we did. I try to be aware of my family relationships, but it was interesting to see what the relationships in my life look like when I have to write them down and categorize them. Also, the interactive class discussion of the married couple at a therapy session was intriguing. I realize it if I think about it, but it was interesting to bring to light the fact that when a therapist focuses on negative emotions and asks about the emotions that draw their clients away from their family - the patient ends up being more attached to the therapist. This puts the therapist in a heroic view that is wrong but makes sense in therapy because its good for business in order to keep clients coming. Something that I want to try to apply in my life is this concept when I speak to my friends and family. I want to be sure to ask questions that are positive and point people in the right direction instead of planting seeds of contention down as separation. This is the same concept that applies to a couple when having problems, a mother or friend can act as the 'bad therapist'. Even if this is by accident, it is important for couples to communicate to each other and not necessarily involve others.

Friday, January 18, 2013

1/18/13 Class Reflections

Before this week I didn’t think that the number of children I have made much of a difference – I was indifferent about the matter. I know that eventually I will have children but I never thought too much about how many. However, this week’s research has greatly influenced my thinking. There is so much affected by the fertility rate in the world. The lack of incoming children is creating an economic demographic for the future that current societies are not aware of. The social security and retirement is falling to pieces because the population is dwindling, which means that fewer people are going to have to work harder to put the elderly into retirement. Where we currently have 3 people working for every 1 elderly person, soon it will be only 2 for every 1 elderly and eventually only 1 on 1 if we continue with the economic decline we are in. Economic turmoil isn’t the only thing that lurks in our future. Children who don’t have any siblings have a greater chance of social hinderment and loneliness which increases chances of depression. The demographic consequences of having more children fully support everything that our prophets have to say to us. The fact that our church is centered around the family and that is the basic component that lies at the root of so much economic turmoil only strengthens my testimony in my beliefs and in the fact that the prophets are men of God who are inspired to give us the revelation that they do.